Tonight I write to you while flying across the country. Almost 5 hours in a plane could probably cause anyone to organize and then reorganize his or her desktop. This is the third time in three hours for me…
But, I didn’t just do it to be more organized.
Well, the first time I did, but then I was remembering the memories – old photos, articles, emails and book chapters. I read and reread things I haven’t seen in months – maybe even years. And then when I thought I was done going through the past few years on my desktop – I found yet another folder… full of memories.
Time has gone by so fast…
I realized several things about myself while going through my files. First and foremost – how much I’ve evolved and grown in 2009. And second, everything that has happened in my life over the course of a year. What a wild and crazy ride! Several mountains have been climbed, choices have been made at four-way stops, paved roads changed to dirt ones and then back again.
I look back on it all and think about the coulda, woulda, shoulda… but I’m really happy with how everything worked out. At the beginning of this year, I would have said, “it’s funny how things don’t work out”. Now I say “it’s funny how they do”.
I definitely didn’t go with the flow in 2009. For some reason… I always select the most difficult paths – the most complicated ones. That’s what I do. And look at me now. I didn’t get here without hard work and dedication, of course. I worked my butt of in 2009. But I took the most complicated plan, which brought me hard times – but most importantly – success and happiness. And I’m so thankful for that.
Of course, there are things that didn’t work out – and I really thought they would. I convinced myself they would; my mind was set to believe that. And I came out of those times pretty disappointed. Actually – really disappointed. But I know that 1) you never know what the future holds and 2) I was able to take something away from each disappointment and I learned so much from it.
Take a moment and think back to your last 11 ½ months. I’m sure you’ll also notice a pattern of change. How did you deal with it? Did you take the most challenging “road less traveled” path? Or did you simply go with the flow?
I’m sure you all are reading this and thinking to yourself – yes, I wish certain things had worked out in 2009. And like me, I’m sure you think about it all the time. Those missteps, missed chances and unsure choices you made. But know that they are all part of who you are today. Who knows what the future holds. Maybe you’ll get a second change. Or better yet, maybe you’ll be thankful that things didn’t work out.
Just know that in this moment everything is the way it should be. There is no such thing as coincidence. Everything happens for a reason. That reason resides within you and one day you will understand. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. But, someday – all of this will make sense.
I sit here in awe… knowing that this computer holds so many memories; great times, bittersweet endings and opportunity for new beginnings. Bring on 2010. I’m ready.