For the record, I’m alone because…

Yes, it’s true. I’m single and alone. When I first came to terms with being alone yet again, I wondered if there was something wrong with me. Do I set my standards too high? Can I ever be satisfied? Am I asking for too much? Will I ever be completely happy?

But in this moment – things are different. Things are clearer. And I want to explain why I am alone and single.  Here’s my positive take on it:

I’m single and full of life. I have a lot to offer and I’m not willing to just give that to anyone. I know people judge me about my current situation and my relationships in the past, but I’m unjaded by their comments. I laugh at them actually. You have to. It’s the only way through this mess.

It’s hard to admit, but I am lonely. I don’t necessary like it. But I chose this, and I’m in control of it. I have an amazing family, great friends, fantastic business contacts and colleagues… and I’m constantly meeting new and exciting people every day.

I’m alone because I’m finally comfortable with myself. I’m alone because I have never, nor will I ever, need someone to complete me. I’m already a whole, healthy and happy person. I have an amazing career, my own interests, and I’m proudly independent.

Don’t get me wrong, I would love someone to compliment my life, add to its richness, challenge me, introduce me to new passions, make me laugh, and be a real partner – romantically and as a friend. But, I’m alone because I refuse to settle.

I’m alone because the timing was off. I know I’ve let some great men go – because the timing simply wasn’t right. It sucks, but it’s life. And sometimes those experiences give you hope and remind you that even though it may have felt like a fairytale – all fairytales have bittersweet endings. Everyone should experience bittersweet, only because it makes you stronger and more determined to not settle. It’s simply a reminder to ‘keep on keeping on’… searching for your soul mate.

I’m alone because there’s more to me than meets the eye. I love exploring, going out, being adventurous, but I also love to stay in. I enjoy eating at great restaurants, but I also love to make a great meal at home. I don’t have children, but I love them. I love getting dressed up, but I love dressing down – wearing something simple, comfortable… like jeans and flip flops.

I’m alone because I’m not impressed enough by someone’s looks, title, or net worth to be instantly infatuated. I adore style, but I also need substance.

I’m alone because there’s a whole lot of growing up, life experience, and lessons-learned that made me who I am today. It’s not baggage, it’s a life lived fully and passionately, with its fair share of successes and stumbles along the way.

I’m alone because I believe that relationships deserve nurturing, creativity and passion. I don’t have time for people who don’t believe that. I’m alone because I can be, and I choose to be. But, that doesn’t mean I want to be alone forever. I’ve been in love, and I look forward to feeling that way again someday.

Special thanks to ‘B’ – you said what I was thinking… and it feels so good to get it down on ‘paper’.

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6 Comments

Filed under Personal Thoughts, What's up in my neck of the woods?

6 responses to “For the record, I’m alone because…

  1. kfred85

    Thank you for getting it out. I’m sure you feel better! It’s nice to know that other people have those insecurities and fears. I’m happy for you that you’ve come to terms with who you are and appreciate all you have to give. So many of us could take a page (or a chapter) from your book. Keep on being you 🙂 Hope it’s a good day.

  2. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and refreshing to see a positive spin placed on being single.

    Cheers,

    Michael

  3. You took the words right out of my mouth! well said

  4. mirek2386

    Your reasons for being alone are not very convincing, probably even for Yourself. Some day you will change your mind and see how much you lost. It is not easy to find worthy partner, but is also worth to try to find one.

  5. Thanks for sharing…

  6. Rick

    Chelsea,

    Good for you, girl! Coming from a man’s perspective, I can say a hardy “Amen”… I’m “alone” too (but not really) for all the same reasons. And I wouldn’t want it any other way!

    I just came to the end of a 4 year investment with one of the greatest women on earth, but she just didn’t have the same passions that I do, and I’m NOT willing to give those up JUST so I can have someone to “share” life with.

    Most people end up getting married for all the wrong reasons (most fall in lust, not love, anyway, and when the lust wears off, there’s not much left to work with). I would rather go through life alone, then live with the regret that I had to “give up” a part of me in order to make someone else happy.

    With all you are involved with, you seem like an incredible woman! Take a few DNA samples and spread them around, will you please? The world needs more women like you! 🙂

    Continued success in all you do, sweetheart!

    p.s. Sorry for the long post – just wanted to encourage you that you’re really NOT “alone”. 🙂

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